What is shame? It's a feeling of worthlessness that we get when we feel the most vulnerable, when we feel like we have done something very wrong. We feel useless, worthless, and low. Our shame originates from when we were curious little kids learning new things in the world. If we innocently did something very wrong our parents yelled at us -- DON'T do that!!! Sometimes they yelled so loud, we felt that our actions weren't wrong -- we felt that WE were intrinsically bad, or wrong. That painful emotion and feeling of worthlessness was shame. We often feel shame in our bodies more than our minds. Some symptoms are a tightness in the chest, hot feeling, sick to the stomach, flushing of the face, looking down, withdrawing, slumping, weakness in the body, sleepiness, shaking, or wanting to run away. Sometimes we don't even know what we are ashamed of because the physical sensation is so strong it blots out our awareness. Shame is an emotion that nobody wants to feel since it is so very uncomfortable. We do many things to avoid feeling shame. Some people avoid feeling shame by: Drinking, drugging, overeating, smoking Compulsive behaviors: gambling, shopping, Internet use Getting really mad at others (rage-aholics) Running away, overworking Depression The above is a basic starter on shame from the 2 books I've read, both of which are excellent (you can find them here www.timeabusers.com/pages/5/index.htm ) For now, just give your shame some gentle awareness. Be aware of the shame in your body and realize that being ashamed is OK. It's just a feeling. The more you are kind to yourself and allow yourself to sit quietly with your shame, the less power it will have over you. Please post your own ideas and thoughts on shame! We can learn from each others' experiences!! Love Laura